If you do a quick internet search, you’ll see that my story includes the devastation of abortion of a wanted baby within the context of marriage. I write with a heart that will always lead with love and compassion on the topic of abortion, untangled from political opinions. This piece is intended to discuss how abortion, like other painful decisions, can sometimes stem from generational patterns within families that not only impact women but also men, extended families, and future generations.
In some Christian circles, the term “generational curse” is used, but we will use the term cycle here. Whether or not you or your family can personally relate to an abortion experience, any conversation that compassionately opens the topic of abortion is courageous and can translate into tangible help for hurting hearts around the world.
We are first met with the idea of generational curses (cycles) in the book of Exodus 20:5 (New International Version), where we read, “I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me.” We see this repeated in Exodus 34:7. For this discussion, we will not examine the distinction between punishment and consequences, nor are these verses intended as a judgment.
Generational cycles describe the transmission of destructive behaviors, traumas, mindsets, and patterns from one generation to the next. Within families, these dysfunctions can be passed down both directly and indirectly, often resurfacing in the lives of children who unconsciously replicate what they’ve inherited. Left unaddressed, these patterns contribute to rising rates of addiction, abuse, chronic illness, and other damaging outcomes. They shape not only individual lives but entire communities, reinforcing cycles of pain that can feel inescapable. Some of these behaviors are “caught,” influenced by genetics, while others are “taught,” learned through observation and experience—many are a complex mix of both. Without intervention, these cycles can perpetuate themselves, replicating across generations with quiet persistence.
The internet, social media, talk shows, and podcasts regularly engage with deeply painful issues—substance abuse, alcoholism, sex trafficking, codependency, abusive relationships, eating disorders, abortion, and more. Yet when these same topics are approached through a Christian lens, they are sometimes rejected by audiences as “too much” for the American palate. As a result, many of these urgent conversations remain absent from church spaces, where silence can be misinterpreted as shame.
But silence does not negate the need for healing. Scripture reminds us that our adversary seeks to steal, kill, and destroy—and division is one of his most effective tools. If this conversation feels uncomfortable, consider that a sign of its importance. Most importantly, there is hope for breaking and healing dysfunctional patterns, but we have to go through the hard to get to the healing. When facing an unplanned pregnancy, choosing abortion may pose less stigma and cause less cognitive dissonance for women and men if they’ve been exposed to their mother, sister, aunt, other relatives, or close family friends having an abortion. However, the decision itself and the suffering that likely follows are anything but easy. Abortion is traumatic regardless of circumstances.
Sydna Masse, author of the book Her Choice to Heal, who has worked with post-abortive women and the abortion-vulnerable for over 30 years, shares that she’s seen clear trends in abortion behavior across generations. As an abortion recovery leader myself, I have listened to and read many stories of women who recount their mother or sister’s abortion or, more miraculously, how they were almost aborted themselves.
Like every generational cycle, the cycle of abortion can be broken. While there are countless reputable counseling resources, books, programs, classes, and retreats designed to help in the healing of substance abuse, sexual abuse, eating disorders, codependency, abortion, and so many other areas of suffering, complete and total healing is found in accepting Jesus Christ as our Savior, who offers free, unmerited grace and eternal forgiveness. Unlike other paths to healing, which are inherently good, walking the path to healing with Jesus is not just good; it is restorative and redemptive. That’s our God, and that’s my King!
When your identity is in Christ, you no longer need to identify with dysfunctional family patterns. You can choose to break free, heal, and become a change agent and ambassador of Christ for future generations. If you are carrying the weight of generational sin or the pain of abuse, abortion, or any of the struggles discussed here, know that you don’t have to face them alone. Reach out for support. In Jesus, there is a starting point for healing and a source of hope for every wounded heart.
Written by Jenny Foster, as published in the Summer edition of The Sisterhood Magazine available at https://www.thesisterhoodmag.com/.