Women, ages 60 and over, are one of the hardest age groups to reach for healing from an abortion. It is a fearful thing for these women to come forward and bring to light something that happened decades ago. These women have deeply buried their abortion, and for many years they have tried to simply forget about it. The idea of looking at this old wound is frightening. All regret. All carry shame. None of them want to face this sin. Any sin but this sin. Abortion takes our children, our babies. It takes from us what we are created to do – shelter and nurture the babies in our wombs until birth. Most women who have gone through an abortion healing group will tell you that they now see they should have gotten up and walked out and endured whatever pressure was waiting them because their baby was worth it. But – abortion was the choice they made.
That is what Lady K was facing as she entered my group. She didn’t understand why she needed to talk about her abortion. She didn’t think it was necessary to examine something that she thought was no longer affecting her life.
As we approached a homework that involved writing a letter to their baby, Lady K became more subdued and more introspective. The reading of the letters would take place at the next session, and it is one of the most sacred times in our group sessions. The reading of these letters is intimate, personal, heartbreaking, and freeing all at the same time. At that session, Lady K was honest to admit that she didn’t write her letter. However, as each of the other ladies read their letters, she committed to writing hers before our next session. I knew it would be beautiful, as they all are.
During the next week, she sent me her baby card information. This information tells me what to put on the certificate for life for each baby. The year and month Lady K listed caught my attention as I realized two things. First, it had been 53 years since her abortion and the struggle was still evident. Second, I realized her baby would have been born the month before I was. My breath caught in my chest – what joy, oh, the sweetness of our Lord! I replied to her email to share with her what an amazing privilege it was to be the one God chose to take her on this journey! I shared that I was only a month younger than her daughter would have been. It still brings me to tears as I consider the honor bestowed upon me to be a woman of her daughter’s age and to be the one helping in the healing of her mother.
Lady K walked away from shame in this group. She embraced motherhood lost, she embraced God’s truth, she embraced a new outlook on her life. Lady K is forgiven and set free.
